The "I work with dumb people" thread

[FergusonTO35]

I actually have competent coworkers and immediate bosses that are Also competent. Now corporate is a different animal. Our safety guy sent out a cold weather bullet point email where he said, #2 Use waterfowl to prevent pipe freezing. I know it was a typo, but the a55hat only sends out one email a month, you would think he would proofread it

So, use number 2 waterfowl shot to prevent pipes freezing. Yes sir, I will be blasting away!! Steel, bismuth, or Hevi-Shot?

 

[Firewood Hoarder]

So, use number 2 waterfowl shot to prevent pipes freezing. Yes sir, I will be blasting away!! Steel, bismuth, or Hevi-Shot?

Hevi-Shot as long as the company is buying!

 

[Jscb1b]

The company I work for has been bought by some stupid fùckṣ̌ out of California. They want to send me to training in Racine. OK, sure, fine. They will not approve a rental car. I have to Uber or Lyft from the airport to my hotel and to training and dinner for a week. Then back to the airport. I have to pay for it then wait a month to get reimbursed.

 

[pbillyi69]

The company I work for has been bought by some stupid fùckṣ̌ out of California. They want to send me to training in Racine. OK, sure, fine. They will not approve a rental car. I have to Uber or Lyft from the airport to my hotel and to training and dinner for a week. Then back to the airport. I have to pay for it then wait a month to get reimbursed.

f that

 

[Yukon Stihl]

I've just had to learn more tactful ways of informing coworkers/ managers that they aren't very bright.

Tell them they are very unlucky at thinking…

 

[Kiwioilboiler]

I've just had to learn more tactful ways of informing coworkers/ managers that they aren't very bright.

Just start calling them Lantern at every opportunity Greg. Eventually someone will ask why and you can reply "Because they're not very bright and everyone has to carry them".

Anyway I stopped by one of the competing parts stores today and checked to see if they had an open spot. They do, and their manager recognized me as a customer and got my name, said he'll pull my application when I submit it online.

You are 100 percent sure he didn't say "pull over" Joe?

 

[Lnk]

So, use number 2 waterfowl shot to prevent pipes freezing. Yes sir, I will be blasting away!! Steel, bismuth, or Hevi-Shot?

There were 5 things he sent, I will post a screenshot later. I just remember #2

 

[redline4]

The company I work for has been bought by some stupid fùckṣ̌ out of California. They want to send me to training in Racine. OK, sure, fine. They will not approve a rental car. I have to Uber or Lyft from the airport to my hotel and to training and dinner for a week. Then back to the airport. I have to pay for it then wait a month to get reimbursed.

When I go to the training center near Chicago they either give me a company card or cash or I don't go. Take one of our rentals too.
That's some bs right there. Zero reason the employee should have to float any bill for the company. Unless it's your company.

 

[Jscb1b]

These fùckṣ̌ issued gas cards for the service trucks. 5 of them did not work. The fleet manager said "call the customer and tell them we can't make it today".

 

[Only the Tony]

Tell them to listen for the pop.

 

[Lnk]

 

[full chizel]

View attachment 447895

You crossed out where he called you guys retards?

 

[redline4]

I just watched a coworker I call Boots partially loosen an oil drain plug without a drain barrel within 20', then rather than tighten it, just let it leak while he went in search of an oil drain barrel..

 

[FergusonTO35]

View attachment 447895

So, it is so cold that frostbite can occur in less than 10 minutes and we need to keep pets inside. However, we are not to use gas or kerosene space heaters inside. Ok, gotcha, you want us to freeze to death inside.

 

[FergusonTO35]

The company I work for has been bought by some stupid fùckṣ̌ out of California. They want to send me to training in Racine. OK, sure, fine. They will not approve a rental car. I have to Uber or Lyft from the airport to my hotel and to training and dinner for a week. Then back to the airport. I have to pay for it then wait a month to get reimbursed.

Just tell them you don't have the money for it, and it sounds like they don't either.

 

[JoeDirt]

The police showed up to work today and for once they weren't here to take any of our employees into custody!

 

[Bill G]

The police showed up to work today and for once they weren't here to take any of our employees into custody!
View attachment 447940

I thought you quit?

 

[Loony661]

I thought you quit?

 

[FergusonTO35]

The police showed up to work today and for once they weren't here to take any of our employees into custody!
View attachment 447940

Free donuts?

 

[Bill G]

This past Christmas morning around 11AM I was sitting here waiting to go to dinner when I heard a banging on my door.
My doggie started barking and I said "damn boy make a run for it the cops must be here to git ya"
I looked out the window and son of beech it was the cops.

They said Merry Christmas Bill